Titus is Fake

Matt sent in some pictures of his towheaded family and the first thing that stands out is that Titus is obviously fake. He's too perfect-looking, like he was made out of porcelain and designed by Gerber focus groups. Evidence:



Cole does a remarkable job of keeping up the charade. But we know that Titus is still fake:


These baby-like hand gestures aren't fooling anybody:



More fakeness:


This is what really gave it away. Look at how much they oversold the whole food-on-a-baby's-face thing. Nice try.


The more I look at these pictures, the more I'm wondering: is Mary real?


Does that look like a real person to you? And come to think of it, has anybody ever seen Mary get mad or do anything even remotely not-calm ever? Ever??


Now Matt and Cole: obviously crazy and so obviously real.

But if Cole was fake, this is what he'd look like short-circuiting:

What you can't hear from looking at this picture is the mechanical sound of Titus's head swiveling to the side:


Yeah, totally fake. But totally cute anyway.